1.
You
sat
in
the
same
desk
for
4
years
and
worked
for
3
different
companies.
2.
Your
resume
is
always
updated
or
is
on
a
diskette
in
your
pocket.
3.
When
someone
asks
what
you
do
for
a
living,
you
lie
because
you
cannot
really
explain
or
justify
what
you
do.
4.
You
get
really
excited
about
a
3%
pay
raise.
5.
Your
biggest
loss
from
a
systems
crash
is
that
you
lose
your
best
jokes.
6.
You
sit
in
a
cubicle
smaller
than
your
bedroom
closet.
7.
It's
dark
on
your
drive
to
and
from
work.
8.
Fun
is
when
issues
are
assigned
to
someone
else.
9.
Communication
is
something
your
"group"
is
having
problems
with.
10.
You
see
a
good
looking
person
and
know
it
is
a
visitor.
11.
Free
food
left
over
from
a
meeting
is
your
main
staple.
12.
Art
involves
a
white
board.
13.
All
real
work
is
done
prior
to
9:00am
and
after
5:00pm.
14.
You're
already
1
week
late
on
an
assignment
you
just
received.
15.
Dilbert
is
your
favorite
cartoon.
16.
Your
boss's
favorite
lines
are......"When
you
get
a
few
minutes",
"In
your
spare
time",
"When
you're
freed
up",
"I
have
an
opportunity
for
you","Can
you
do
me
a
favor"
17.
More
than
10%
of
the
people
in
our
company
do
not
know
what
you
do.
18.
Vacation
is
something
you
roll
over
to
next
year
or
a
check
you
get
every
January.
19.
Change
is
the
norm
20.
Nepotism
is
encouraged
21.
You
have
a
copy
of
the
minimum
wages
laws
in
the
break
room
and
you
are
barely
over
qualified.
22.
The
person
you
trained
two
years
ago
at
another
company
is
now
your
new
boss.
23.
When
you
call
the
Daily
Shipping
News,
they
automatically
give
you
the
opportunities
available
at
the
other
shipping
companies.
24.
Your
reference
books
have
names
of
several
other
shipping
companies
and
at
least
1/2
of
them
are
no
longer
in
business.
25.
All
the
people
you
meet
at
the
Industry
parties
are
older,
fatter,
or
balder
than
what
you
remember.
26.
Your
social
calendar
has
Fridays
permanently
blocked
off.
27.
The
Shipping
Line
books
freight
for
you
but
attributes
it
to
a
Shipping
Company
your
left
six
months
ago.
28.
Most
of
the
pens
and
note
pads
you
use
are
from
service
providers
no
longer
in
business.
29.
You
purposely
keep
operational
secrets
to
make
you
more
valuable
to
the
current
employer.
30.
You
have
been
asked
in
a
interview:
A)
"How
much
business
can
you
bring
with
you?"
and
B)
"Can
you
start
today?"
31.
You
switch
Shipping
Companies
and
you
know
at
least
one
person
in
a
foreign
office
that
worked
with
you
sometime
in
the
past.
32.
You
boss
is
the
boss
only
because
they
were
too
stupid
to
switch
to
another
company.
33.
The
person
doing
accounting
or
collections
is
accorded
special
privileges
because
no
one
else
wants
to
do
it.
34.
People
around
you
have
college
degrees
in
things
not
related
to
what
they
are
doing.
35.
A)
You
hate
the
person
that
got
you
into
this
industry.
B)
Curse
the
day
you
entered
the
industry.
36.
You
regret
entering
they
industry
and
wish
you
could
be
normal
like
all
the
other
people
out
there.
(Once
in
the
industry,
you
can't
get
out.
If
you
do
get
out
you
are
miserable
and
it
is
not
long
before
you
come
back.)
37.
You
get
married
and
the
only
friends
you
can
invite,
work
for
the
shipping
lines.
38.
You
love
it
when
a
service
provider
shows
up
around
lunch
time!
39.
You
hear
of
a
back
water
city
in
a
back
water
country
in
the
news
and
you
remember
a
shipment
you
have
sent
there
in
exact
detail.
40.
Your
wear
out
a
stapler
in
about
a
year
and
you
name
each
one.
41.
You
keep
a
plastic
cup
on
your
desk
and
place
used
staples
in
it.
42.
You
have
at
least
a
pile
of
4
inches
or
one
Months
worth
of
accounting
at
any
one
time
stacked
on
your
desk.
43.
Have
at
least
four
stacks
of
papers
on
your
desk
(One
working
pile,
three
unknown).
44.
Find
a
Correction
Advice
or
a
request
for
a
rate
change
on
your
desk
six
months
after
it
was
faxed.
45.
You
answer
the
phone
and
actually
understand
the
accent
of
the
person
speaking.
46.
Your
closest
confidant
to
whom
you
tell
all
your
secrets
works
in
customer
service
at
a
shipping
line
whom
you
have
never
met.
47.
You
put
many
more
staples
than
needed
on
you
export
pouches
because
the
destination
office
applies
at
least
six
on
each
document
attached
to
their
pouches.
48.
You
can't
remember
anything
you
did
yesterday,
but
you
can
reassure
your
boss
you
were
very
busy
and
point
to
any
stack
of
papers
on
your
desk.
49.
If
anything
goes
wrong,
you
can
blame
it
on
the
person
that
quit
the
company
for
at
least
a
month.
And
since
there
are
many,
you
have
an
endless
supply
of
alibis.
Or
....
50.
It
was
the
FNG's(f---ing
new
guy)
fault.
Since
they
are
always
new
employees,
they
are
good
for
a
few
falls
51.
You
know
and
understand
that
labels
attached
themselves
to
cartons.
Therefore
no
one
can
be
blamed
for
cross
labeling.
52.
Murphy's
Law
of
Shipping
is:
A)
A
shipment
will
have
problems
if
it
is
a
brand
new
client
and
this
is
the
first
trial
given
to
you.
B)
Shipment
will
have
problems
only
when
everyone
at
your
company
and
the
shippers
are
carefully
monitoring.
C)
Once
a
shipment
has
a
problem,
there
is
never
only
one
problem
to
solve,
they
come
in
multiples.
Each
solution
creates
another
problem
and
you
pray
that
the
freight
Gods
look
fair
upon
you
and
hope
the
destination
office
can
find
the
cure.
53.
Anyone
who
has
a
clean
desk
must
not
have
anything
to
do
and
is
shunned
by
all
others
in
the
office.
54.
Your
calendar
has
Monday
as
the
first
day
of
the
week.
55.
You
like
an
occasional
Letter
of
Credit
shipment
because
you
can
ask
people
to
leave
you
alone
and
they
will!!
56.
You
accidentally
in
public
refer
to
cities
names
by
their
three
letter
code.
57.
You
can
keep
track
of
all
details
of
a
Million
Dollar
Draft,
but
mess-up
writing
personal
checks.
58.
You
subconsciously
check
your
salesman's
fingers
for
blue
chalk
or
try
to
smell
their
breath
and
secretly
envy
them
for
knowing
what
sunlight
looks
like.
59.
You
date
only
within
your
industry
because
"
no
one
else
would
understand."
60.
The
only
time
you
get
to
see
sunlight
is
when
the
Roach-Coach
(Ptomaine-mobile)
makes
it's
daily
stop.
61.
You
hate
days
that
it
rains
as
it
means
no
smoke
breaks.
62.
You
can't
drive
a
stick
shift
car,
but
feel
comfortable
on
a
forklift.
63.
You
know
in
detail
as
to
what
fits
into
an
Ocean
container
but
can't
pack
a
suitcase
worth
a
darn.
64.
Christmas
means
a
change
of
work
address
right
after
receiving
the
bonus.
65.
This
list
makes
sense
to
you.
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